Romance Scam Victim Warns of Red Flags

In 2014, four men were jailed for conning 12 women out of almost £250,000 through online romance scams, including Ms Deborah Cole.

Deborah fell victim to an online dating scam when she met an American widower who called himself ‘James Smith’ in 2013 on Match – an online dating website. James began to ask for sums of money, including £700 and then a further £10,000, which he claimed were for legal fees. She later found out about the scam from the solicitor that James had said he was using.

Although there were red flags, Ms Cole believed her fraudster partner to be genuine after he sent images of his driving licence and passport. However, she became suspicious after James had asked for the significant sum of £10,000, prompting her to contact the number of a solicitor that James had included in his emails. The solicitor’s firm then confirmed that they had nothing to do with the scammer.

Romance scams are a devastating form of Authorised Push Payment (APP) fraud that preys on victims’ emotional vulnerability, often resulting in them being exploited financially as well as emotionally. APP fraud is an umbrella term for fraud that involves gaining a victim’s trust before tricking them into sending money under false pretences. Other types of APP fraud include:

• impersonation scams
• crypto and investment scams
• employment scams

Recalling her experience, Ms Cole said “there was always an excuse why they couldn’t come and meet you face-to-face, that should have been a red flag.”

She then added that the fraudster used an excessive amount of emojis including hearts that seemed “a bit over the top.” Although some red flags are more obvious, others are very subtle. Ms Cole called the set-up of the scam “very clever” and “professional” as she was asked for money indirectly, in a way that manipulated her emotions.

With advancing technology, scams are becoming more sophisticated, making it easier for anyone to fall victim to APP fraud. Ms Cole now urges anyone in a similar situation to “just stand back for a minute” and not to ignore subtle signs, especially if there is an exchange of money being requested. Unfortunately, those who do fall victim often experience feelings of shame and self-blame which can stop them from taking action; it’s important for scam victims to know there is help available and legal routes to gain justice and compensation against scammers like those who stole from Ms Cole.

There are several routes a scam victim can take to recover money they have lost:

• Firstly, tell your bank about the scam as soon as possible. Under the new APP fraud reimbursement rules which were introduced in October 2024, banks and other regulated financial institutions are obligated to investigate your case and then compensate you within five working days if your case is straightforward.
• If your bank disputes your case for compensation, you may need to make a claim through the Financial Ombudsman Service (FOS). FOS is an independent body responsible for settling disputes between financial institutions, including banks, and their customers.
• Another route to compensation could be through a criminal Court order. This can happen if a scammer is arrested and found guilty in Court. Unfortunately, because of resourcing challenges and how sophisticated the scams can be, it is quite rare for the police to successfully prosecute scammers. However, a private prosecution may be possible.

If the police and/or the Crown Prosecution Service decide not to investigate or prosecute allegations of a romance scam, then it may still be possible in certain very specific circumstances to pursue a private criminal prosecution and in turn seek a potential compensation order through the criminal Courts.

Private prosecutions follow the same legal framework as a police prosecution and can lead to a conviction, sentencing and compensation orders. To successfully bring a private prosecution, you must have evidence that meets the “beyond reasonable doubt” threshold. Your legal team will firstly review the evidence and advise you whether they can proceed.

If sufficient evidence is found, your solicitor will then gather forensic evidence and guide you through the Court process.

Sarah Spruce, Legal Director at TLW Solicitors, comments:

“The first thing I tell clients after experiencing the devastating effects of a romance scam is not to be ashamed or embarrassed; anyone can fall victim to APP fraud, and help is available to help recover lost funds.

When public authorities such as the police or Crown Prosecution Service decide not to prosecute, I would urge victims to explore private prosecutions as a potential option for holding criminals accountable and securing compensation.

Whether it’s private prosecution, APP fraud reimbursement from the bank, or through FOS, there are a range of options available to help victims of fraud. If you or a loved one have fallen victim to financial crime, get in touch with a member of my team for a confidential, no obligation discussion to explore your options.”

Our specialist fraud and financial crime team understand the devastating effects of romance scams for victims. At TLW Solicitors, we offer empathetic and confidential support for victims seeking resolution and compensation through civil recovery and private prosecution routes.

Whether you’re looking to recover your money, pursue justice or both, TLW Solicitors can help you take back control after the emotional and financial damage of a scam.